Astrid’s Testimony – New Haven RTC

Trigger Warning: emotional abuse, physical abuse, self harm, suicide.

I was sent to New Haven when I was 15 for severe depression, eating disorder, self harm, and suicidal ideation. I came back with all of those issues, plus severe PTSD.

Most of the time I was on the Safety phase, which meant I had to be in 5 feet of a staff member at all times. I had to sleep in the living room and watched in the bathroom. I started to get angry about having my rights taken away, so I tried to run away. I was restrained in a public park, where children were around. I tried to run twice more after that. The third time I ran, it was with my best friend, and when we got caught and brought back to property, we were not allowed to speak to each other.

One day we ignored that and decided to sit outside and talk. we did not pose a threat to ourselves or anyone else, yet we were literally dragged back to our seclusion rooms. That is not the worst of it though. My entire time at New Haven I was severely suicidal, but didn’t have the means to carry it out, until July 9, 2017; I found an extremely sharp piece of glass and took it to my wrist. I couldn’t take the pain anymore. I had to be rushed to the emergency room. when i got back the next day i was put on suicide watch, and was secluded to a tiny room for two days. I was restrained when i tried to leave. in those two days after i attempted suicide, i begged anyone to talk to me, but everyone ignored me, even my own therapists. finally they sent me to a psych hospital, which turned out to be even worse than New Haven. The University of Utah Neuropsychiatric Institute, where I was traumatized further.

I am 21 now and I still suffer from PTSD from these experiences.

It’s time to end the Troubled Teen Industry.

Thank you for listening to my story.